21.1.18

WHY I'M FINALLY BORED OF TRAVELLING

Queenstown, New Zealand

I never thought the day would come where I'd find myself - dare I say - bored of travelling. It's been my biggest passion in life for 3 years now, and I don't think I'll ever want to stop visiting new places. But something's changed in me this year, something I briefly touched on a few months back. My desire to travel used to be so strong, it felt like a burning flame would ignite inside of me. I was a woman possessed, someone so consumed with itineraries and booking flights, that nothing else in life gave me the same buzz. Travel became 'my thing', and even to this day I have people messaging me asking for advice on their upcoming trips. I feel like it's the one thing I'm really knowledgeable about, and I love helping people who are nervous and need their questions answering. But after years of thinking travel was the only thing that could make me happy, I've done a complete 360. My life has changed, and I've realised I don't need it as a clutch anymore.

Tongariro Alpine Crossing, New Zealand

You see, life is uncertain when you graduate uni. It's that horrible stage where you don't know what path your career will take, you have no money, and you basically feel like a lost child in an adult's body. It's like you're in limbo - neither a careless teenager nor a fully fledged responsible adult. Looking back, I wouldn't say that stage of my life was a particularly happy one. You're kind of just plodding along, wondering if things will fall into place or not. I guess it was that feeling of not being in control that urged me to travel in the first place. It was something I could take by the balls - I could make it happen and finally leave that feeling of uncertainty behind. I think that's why a lot of people decide to travel. They don't really know what direction their life is taking, so the easiest thing is to run away - to find joy elsewhere. 'Running away' comes with a lot of negative connotations, but in this instance I don't think it's a bad thing. If you're confused and need time to reflect on your future, you might as well do it from a hammock right? There's no point wallowing in your own self pity whilst working a dead end job. Take a year out, have fun and give yourself time to reflect on what you really want.

Waitomo, New Zealand

It was only a few months ago that I realised I'd been using travel to 'run away' too. My mum noticed way before I did, but she was right. Years later my path was still uncertain, which is why I was always so desperate to book a new trip. It provided the perfect distraction, and was the one thing in life that brought me happiness. But as I sit here on this grey Sunday afternoon - having moved to Manchester, made a great group of friends and found a job that I love - I don't feel the need to run away anymore. That burning desire to constantly leave the country has gone. Don't get me wrong, my bucket list is still as long as my arm, but that sense of urgency has disappeared. I've finally found joy in the 9-5, in going out for food with friends, and getting a bargain in Primark. I enjoy my routine of going to the gym after work, doing a healthy food shop, and crashing in front of the TV watching a new series on Netflix. I feel settled knowing I'm on the path I was always meant to be on, and that years of uncertainty have been replaced with a sense of stability. 

Franz Josef Glacier, New Zealand

Despite being 'bored' of travelling, it was - and will always be - the best thing I've ever done. I have a quote on my phone screensaver that says "Do not regret or deny your journey. It all had to be what it was in order for you to find your path" - a quote that I would probably get tattooed on me if I liked tattoos. But while people my age are still heading off on their Working Holiday Visa's to Australia (I've had 3 friends go in the last month), I don't envy them anymore. It's their time for uncertainty, for excitement and to figure out what they want from life. But it's not mine. For once, I welcome stability and my own country with open arms - a life that I don't want to run from anymore.

x

29.10.17

LIFE UPDATE / PART 2

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Afternoon lovelies!

It's a miserable, rainy Sunday so I thought I'd carry on with my life update post - this time focusing on the gym, fashion and travel. Hopefully this post won't be as wordy as the last one!

GYM

So I'm not sure if I've mentioned this before, but when I went travelling I put on about a stone in weight. No biggie, it's pretty much a given when you go on a 9 month holiday. In fact, I'm surprised I didn't put on more with the amount of alcohol and $5 Dominoes I consumed. I was having so much fun, I didn't really care at the time. I literally lived in hostels non stop for just under a year, so even if I wanted to get in shape, I wasn't living in the right environment to do so. Cooking in hostels is awkward, there's a massive drinking culture and gyms in Australia are EXPENSIVE. I knew that when the time was right, I would make it my priority again and get the weight off.

I tried when I was back in England for 3 months. I went back to my old gym, but my motivation just wasn't there. I was unhappy in my job, so I couldn't force myself to go to the gym every night and eat healthy when all I wanted was comfort. Like most people, I'm an emotional eater. Not to the extent some people are, but I can't focus my mind on weight loss if I'm unhappy and distracted by other things. I ended up going to America for 6 weeks the same weight, but weirdly came back a few pounds lighter. Don't ask me how that works (have you SEEN portion sizes in the US?). Then there was the whole moving to Manchester thing. I told myself I wasn't going to worry about losing weight until I settled in properly. My priority was making friends and having a social life, so if that meant eating out a lot then so be it. Like I said, when the time was right, I knew I would put my mind to it. I did it before I went travelling and flew to Thailand the lightest I've ever been. It can be done, I knew that.

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So here we are 3 months later, settled and ready to focus on shifting that weight. I have Christmas parties and my birthday to spur me on which always helps. I'm definitely not big (I'm still a size 10 like I've always been), but I know I'd feel more confident if I trimmed down to the weight I used to be. Luckily portion control or appetite isn't a problem for me. It's more cutting out the alcohol and the 100's of snacks we have hanging around the office. You know what it's like, temptation everywhere. Me and my manager have signed up to Nuffield Health together. We get discount from work but it's still pretty pricey at £40 a month. I used to pay £18 at Pure Gym, but I'll admit it's quite nice going to a swanky gym for a change. Way less intimidating than the cheaper, overcrowded ones. It even has a pool, jacuzzi, sauna and steam room! I signed up to Nuffield because it's 5 mins from work, so I thought it would encourage me to go more. Especially now I don't drive to the gym, it takes a lot more effort to convince myself to walk there. But I've been doing okay. I'm definitely not a '6 times a week' gal like I used to be, but I'll get there. It's baby steps, but at least it's a step in the right direction.

FASHION

I lost my way with fashion and trends when I went travelling. Hardly surprising when you're living out of a backpack and would rather spend money on experiences than clothes. It's actually quite refreshing because no one judges you or cares what you wear. I always find it funny when bloggers go 'travelling' and spend their entire time taking ootd's looking uber glamorous. That's honestly not what it's like. In Asia, you're lucky if you wash your clothes once a fortnight, and you bet I'm wearing my one 'nice' dress 3 times that week. Ahh those were the days.

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Now I'm back in England, it's been exciting rediscovering my style and what I like and dislike. It helps that Manchester's a pretty cool city, so I've been taking a lot of inspo from people I see wandering the streets. I like to think of my style as casual and boyish, with some quirky pieces thrown in for good measure. I'm definitely more of a Kendal than a Kylie, and I don't like to look like I've tried too hard. That whole groomed and done up to the nines thing just isn't me. Now I've rediscovered my style and got to grips with what trends I like, I find shopping enjoyable again. I have my confidence back and have fallen back in love with fashion.



TRAVEL

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You might have read in one of my previous posts that I decided to take a break from travel when I came back from my America trip. I was pretty worn out and knew I wanted to leave it a while before jetting off again, mainly so I could give my body a rest and erase the pressure of having to constantly save. Fast forward 4 months and I'm ready to get planning again! The constant search for tours and flights never stopped if I'm honest, but I feel like now is the right time to start laying down some firm foundations. Monthly savings have been calculated, weather reports googled and if all goes to plan... I should be heading off to Japan in May! So nothing's booked yet, but as always I'm determined to make my dream trips a reality. I've wanted to go to Japan for SO LONG, and although I wanted to make it happen next year, I wasn't sure if it would be possible. Japan is one of the most expensive countries you can visit, and the tour I wanna do + flights + spending money would cost around £3,000 for 2 weeks. I'm still not 100% sure I can do it (especially now I live away from home and have bills to pay), but there's no harm in trying right? I'll keep you updated, but as well as losing weight, this is my main goal and priority at the moment. If I can stay focused, I'm hoping I'll have the funds to book something soon. Wish me luck!

xxx